I’m sure you’ve heard this before. But let’s look at the facts. This is from Mayo Clinic website:
Feeling that you have to use the drug regularly — this can be daily or even several times a day: They live with you. It’s hard to avoid them. No matter where you go: the bathroom, taking a shower, going to bed, you name it, they are there. You look forward to such wonderful experiences as root canals, gynecology visits, tax .
Failing in your attempts to stop using the drug: See above. You can’t stop.
Making certain that you maintain a supply of the drug: No matter what happens, they are around. They can turn on you at any second. They come from daycare all happy, then the second you close the car door, the tears/ tantrum begins. And you wonder why the daycare doesn’t offer 24 hour service.
Spending money on the drug, even though you can’t afford it: Shoes… my god, I feel like I am constantly buying shoes, returning shoes because they don’t fit or are not the correct color. Of the 15 pairs of shoes I and Grandma has purchased over the last 2 months, 3 pairs are acceptable, 2 pairs are too small and can’t be returned, and the rest are back at the store. And food: I spend more money on organic, cage free, non this or other than I do on anybody else. Does anyone know if WholeFoods is traded on the stock exchange? I should invest. Because a large percentage of salary goes to it.
Doing things to obtain the drug that you normally wouldn’t do, such as stealing: Ok maybe not stealing. But on some days I feel like I am constantly yelling, laying down the law. Yelling at my husband for not engaging in the tantrum.
Feeling that you need the drug to deal with your problems: Last weekend, we went to a Baptism where there were several moms, and we started chatting. It came out that basically when you have kids you lose the part of your brain where you can make small chat with strangers. Everything is about babies or toddlers. And it’s hard to formulate a thought that doesn’t involve babies or toddlers. And if the person you are talking to are 20 year olds, just graduated, have already given you dirty looks cause the fruit of your loin has just lifted up her skirt to show her undies or is currently crying on the floor, you know you have lost the battle to engage this person.
Driving or doing other risky activities when you’re under the influence of the drug: Agreeing to give into the tantrum by provide the banana, juice in the correct container. Whatever it takes to make them be quiet. And you know you shouldn’t be giving in because it sets a precedent. But you already had a hellish day at work, and you were hoping that today your drug would behave and let you enjoy a glass of wine.
Focusing more and more time and energy on getting and using the drug: Because through all the bad times, there are days like last night or this morning, when she wakes up with a smile on her face. And is a joy to be around. And sits on the couch and kisses you and cuddles. There are no fights over what to wear. Didn’t even make sound when I put a pair of shoes that I knew she wasn’t very fond of, but because we only have two pairs of shoes that fit, she needs to deal with it. She calmly said these are not her favorite shoes. But she didn’t whine or cry or make herself limp.
But the kicker is, she knows when she’s being bad. Because after our lovely morning, she says to us. I was good today, right, Mommy? I didn’t whine.
Why can’t she be a good drug all the time???