Let the Friday Freakout Begin…on Thursday

Happy Frursday!  Tomorrow most people are off for Easter, so it’s like a mini holiday for the rest of us.  Whoohoo!!

So the Friday freakout, which normally manifests itself at 3 pm on Friday, has now begun on Thursday at 9:30 am.  Freakishly early even by Friday Freakout standards.  I’ve gotten my panties all in a bunch over a word document, my calculator refusing to add and subtract correctly (and no, it’s not my typing or my large fingers), and an annoying meeting later this afternoon.

Now, I haven’t updated you on the cat situation in the back yard.  Let’s just say the cats are still there.  The two kittens my boss took are now big and crazy. Apparently they totally act like they were birthed in the wilds of our back yard, under the barbecue.  They now sleep with a water bottle next to their heads just to get the freaking cats off the bed.

Yesterday started out like a “lovely” fall day. Really nasty; overcast with the sky just threatening to open up with cold showers. NY1 promised, swore up and down, that if the wind blew correctly at a 75 degree angle, the cold 54 degree day would turn into a 70 degree spring afternoon. By noon, as I went out get my lunch, the promise of the spring day was not visible. It was cold and I had my hat on.  By 2:30 apparently the wind blew just right, and it was sunny and warm.  In honor of this unexpected spring day (I mean to expect spring weather in the spring is almost wishful thinking!!) I went to the FoodWhole (aka WholeFoods) and bought the most BEAUTIFUL pineapple I have ever seen. They had little samples to taste, and being the ever graceful and tasteful girl (that my grandmother swore till her dying day that we are related to Russian royal family) picked of course the largest piece there was, and “gracefully” (of the royal lineage) shoved it in my mouth (I was hungry people). And the sweet flavor was overwhelming.  Summer and sitting on the beach in Bahamas just burst in my mind’s eye! And they were on sale! So my wallet was happy.  So I dragged the beautiful pineapple on the subway, and showed it to my spawn. To which she said, I no like pinapple.  I no want it, Mommy. You haven’t tasted, O. How do you know??  I no want it.

I dragged her tutu clad ass on the bus, and we get home. I plop her outside in the backyard because we are experiencing spring.  She goes and does her thing. Pulling at the grass, taking her Monster and Baby on the deck… And I attack the pineapple. I do my best, and one hour later, the pineapple is cubed and it is DELICIOUS. I take the bowl outside so we can eat it. She touches one of the pieces, and says, That natty.  Well, you need to try it first. Nooooooo!!!!! And runs to the back of the garden (that is literally half a yard away). She runs back to me, screaming: Mommy, MOMMY!!!  That natty! EWWWWW!!!  What is it, Boo??? I look up, and there among the tall blades of grass is a dead mouse. THE FUCKING CATS!!!  Not only do I have to clean their shit from our yard, now they are leaving their food in the yard. I’ve seen dead birds, or pieces of dead birds, feathers strewn throughout the yard, but never a dead mouse.  I have now stopped being polite about the cats. You know, keeping my voice down when I find shit in the yard. I actually say it in normal/ loud voice, The freaking cats shitting in our yard. The neighbor is nice enough, but seriously. Have the cats shit in your yard.

Back to the mouse, though. So I run in, tell DH, There’s a dead mouse in the yard, and you need to deal with it.  Ok, he says. Is it dealt with, you ask. Why no, it’s not!!

This morning, as we are getting ready to go, O looks out in the back yard through the safety of the closed door, and she yells, Look, Mommy, Kitty!! I look out, and the creepy mama cat is sitting along the back wall, just staring. That thing is freaky.  Then I notice that her gaze is now distracted by something on the ground.  She starts pawing it. Then I see what it is. IT’S THE DEAD MOUSE!!!  I yell out, Ewww! That is NASTY. O mimics, That natty!  Who knew living in Queens is like living in the wilds of nature??? I mean, that’s why I don’t go camping! GROSS!


About RidgewoodMom

Thirtysomething mom of a baby girl. First and only baby, possibly. First baby amongst my close friends. These are the trials, frustrations and lessons I have learned in raising a single child in New York.
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