This weekend was pretty rough. The wounds are still pretty raw, so I can’t even talk about it without shedding a tear… In the next post I will have to explain about O’s various torture techniques that she used on her parents.
This weekend I was thrown, of my own choice, into social situations with various levels of acquaintances… from people I see every few years to brand new never met before slightly (ok very much younger) than me people. This last category I probably envy the most since they are just starting out, fresh out of college, their lives ahead of them, full of possibilities. (I think this deep thought is more of reflection on the awful weekend we had.)
On Saturday, I had a lovely time at the spa at JB’s Bachlorette party. I had a facial, popped in and out of sauna and steam room. I had a really good time, and I was very relaxed. During my facial, I almost fell asleep, but the jabbing really prevented full sleep. I chatted with people. Then at one point I realized that I ran out of things to say. After talking to two of the women who have kids, I felt like I ran out of things to say. I didn’t want to be one of those women who can only talk about my kids, and I found myself that I had nothing to say. I don’t go to movies, so I had nothing to contribute to the conversation, until the movie talk turned to movies from three years ago. Then I could contribute, but with an awful memory, my two cents was literally 2 cents.
If I was having such a hard time making conversation, the other two moms are stay at home moms, and I wonder how they felt? I work, so I get out of the house. I’m not surrounded by babies all the time, yet, I couldn’t put two thoughts together that didn’t somehow involve babies or toddlers. The other two mothers seemed to be doing much better with the socialization.
Then on Sunday, this is where the young people come in, we went to Auntie R’s house warming party. A lot of her friends have just recently finished masters or bachelor degrees, so they are fresh out of college. The conversation was mostly about the what they just finished studying, what exciting project they are working on… and our project (O) was running around lifting up her dress and showing her diaper, doing jumps, and inappropriately touching people. I guess our project does not seem as exciting as the documentary film they are each working on. As the room filled up, and O’s jumping space was eaten up, we moved into the bedroom, where then she started chatting with Auntie JB, and flirting with a new friend, who was totally intrigued by her coyness.
She was of course the perfect child, not the cranky one that she was in the car two hours earlier, or the cranky baby she became on the way home. Where we had to stop the music and let her cry it out becuase she was so bad.
But overall, both DH and I were so tried, it was like pulling teeth trying to talk to other people, and I was quite happy to have O as a distraction (or excuse) to not really be able to talk to other people. But I did notice that our lack of social skills at this point was witness by the sudden change of seats…. the first opportunity anyone who was sitting next to us had, they changed seats… I didn’t take it personally. I understand and don’t blame the young people. Seeing O from afar doing her tricks is better than having some stranger bore you with details of O’s life. After the normal questions, of How old is she? She is super cute… there is not much to say from non-parents non-auntie, young people. I think Aunties have a much higher threshold for baby info boredom than strangers.
The saddest of all, is that I did actually try to hold some sort of semblance of a conversation, but I failed miserably, since it took me 3 minutes to get out 1 small sentence (distracted by O trying to pull the alarm clock that was precariously balanced on top of the radiator or running around with Nutella smeared hands around the apartment).
Is this what my future holds??? Oh God, I hope I can become more social…. or at least have more sleep…..
DH pointed out, that we were the first to arrive and the FIRST to leave the party. This would have never happened if we were the youngsters age!