O Has NO chance

of having a normal family…

I told my parents about the kitten situation, my dad tell me he wants one. I tell him, he’s crazy and he already has a dog, he’s renovating his house, and he doesn’t have time for bottle feeding kittens.  All day at work my Dad bombarded me with pictures of cute kittens… kittens on grass, kittens with bunny, kitten being bottle fed, kittens, kittens and more kittens.  At first it started with sending pictures via Skype.  When I stopped accepting the pictures on Skype, he started emailing them to me.  I had 10 emails in the span of an hour.

I get home, tell him (and my mom) that they are crazy. We are not keeping the kittens for 6 weeks, and that’s the end of that.  DH said that I should send them the pictures of the kittens anyway. In the back of my mind was thinking this is not a good idea.  But I got a few pictures of O trying to get at the cats, so I thought the focus would be on Oh, Look how cute my granddaughter is….  Oh NOOOOO…. That is NOT what happened.

I get to work this morning. As my computer is putputing along starting up, Skype starts up first, and my Dad sends me an IM. It just pops up at the bottom right hand side of my screen.  I WANT ONE!!! (actual quote).  My Outlook hasn’t even started up yet.  Then my phone rings, and it’s him.  I don’t know why I answered. I think I am glutton for punishment.  The conversation went something like this:

Dad: I want one

ME: You do not want one.  There are tons of cats in your area.  You can get a cat anytime.

Dad: But they are so cute.

ME: We are not keeping them for six weeks.

Dad: You don’t need to keep them for 6 weeks.  Just until their eyes open. (I don’t know what this has to do with anything. I think it’s an Eastern Euro thing, that kittens don’t need their mama after their eyes open.) Don’t give them away. They are much older than you say. I think they are 2 weeks old at least.

ME : (clenching my teeth) Dad, we came to see you on Friday, there were no kittens. We came back, and Monday morning there were kittens.  They are only 4 days old.

Dad: No.  She had them somewhere else, and moved them. They do that, you know.

Me:  (Rubbing my temples) Dad, I swear to you they are not two weeks old.  DH saw the mama cat, all fat in the middle of our yard last week.  She was still pregnant.

Dad: I think you are wrong.

Me: (definitely loosing patience with the childishness of it all) Regardless, we are giving the kittens and the mama cat to the NYACC, and that’s the end of that.

Dad: NO! I”ll come and get the kitten today.

Me: You are crazy. Why would you drive 3 hours to get a cat, when you can get a cat at your local ASPCA.

Dad: (starts saying something)

Me: (I interrupt) I have to go.  I have a lot of work to do. I’ll talk to you later. Bye

Dad: Bye.

My coworker shakes her head, and suggests different ways to block out their craziness. When my phone rings again. It’s my mom.

I won’t go into the whole conversation, but it went similar to the conversation with my Dad.  In the end it comes out that indeed, my Dad was going to drive TODAY to pick up the fucking kitten.  Yes, it’s true.  Because right now, the most important thing for him was to get a cat.  He does not have enough on his plate, but he will start bottle feeding a cat.  I can’t even talk to her anymore.  The conversation ends unpleasantly, and I call DH and tell him, You like their craziness, you deal with them….

Post Script: DH talked me down from the ledge.  My Mom is coming this weekend to pick up two kittens (one for them, and one for her coworker).  Then we are asking the cat lady neighbor to take the kitten box in her yard, and after 6 weeks we might have other people willing to take them.  Otherwise, after my Mom takes the two, they are OUTTA HERE!!!


About RidgewoodMom

Thirtysomething mom of a baby girl. First and only baby, possibly. First baby amongst my close friends. These are the trials, frustrations and lessons I have learned in raising a single child in New York.
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