In case you didn’t know, football season has started. Ladies, for those of you whose husband/ boyfriend is a football fan, I’m sure you have marked the first Sunday of football season as the beginning of months of lack of cooperation. Previously Sundays were reserved for family activities such as going to the park, out to brunch, some tiding up around the house, now it is marked by profanities screamed at the TV, 6 pack of Heineken, home made buffalo wings, and just complete disregard for any chaos going on around him.
I am the worst kind of NFL widow…. His team is NOT the local team, so the games are not always on TV AND his team has only made it to the post season maybe twice since we’ve been together. So this leads to huge highs (of looking forward to the game) to the most depressed of lows (awful plays, continued losses, and general bad quarterbacking). As any die hard fan, any of these losses are pretty much taken personally. When he talks to his friends on the phone, he refers to the team as “we should be doing this” and “we should have called this play.” Everything revolves around, we the team. Needless to say, this weekend, they lost. And it was depressing. Before we met, I never really watched football, except for the Superbowl (for the commercials). So I never really had a team to watch, just randomly turned it on. But now, I too am slightly invested in his team. But for over 10 years, his team has not really done anything significant so last night I asked him. “Would you ever switch teams?” The horror on his face is indescribable. It’s like I committed the worst atrocity in the world. I continue, “I mean you have the perfect excuse… you could easily switch to a local team (who is doing much better, internal filter stopped me from actually saying this out loud).” He said, after all this pain he could never switch teams. Before every season, he hopes they will do well. The conversation goes something like this:
HE: After picking up XYZ, this will be great. The Defense /Offense is ready to kick some Giant/Dallas/ Eagle ass.
ME: Yeah, that was a good trade (have no idea what he’s talking about)
HE: I really think they will make it to the playoffs this year.
ME: As long as Quarterback/Coach/ Owner doesn’t end up shooting them in the foot.
Then a few days/ weeks later, we are watching the game, and the conversation changes to:
HE: He really needs to start earning that money.
ME: Mmmm (not paying attention)
HE: Quarterback/Coach/ Running Back/ (fill in the blank) is such a bum!!!
ME: Totally! How could he not have caught/dropped/ fumbled/ (fill in the blank)!!! Isn’t that his job!
Then a few hours later, after he’s licked his wounds of the loss, he calls his friend to recap the game, and talk about how “we will do better next week/ shows signs of improvement.” Basically by the following Saturday, he would have completely forgotten the beat down the team got the week before, and the conversation starts over again.
Sorry, O! Your daddy’s busy hating the TV!!!